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Friday, July 29, 2011

CEDAR VASE WITH IMAGE OF A DEMON OR GARGOYLE

So many people assume that if they write a really elaborate description of their item that someone will actually pay a crap ton of money for it. Please let me know if this actually ever works for anyone.

(to see actual listing: http://cgi.ebay.com/CEDAR-VASE-IMAGE-DEMON-GARGOYLE-U-DESIDE-/320723585528?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item4aac9d89f8#ht_1530wt_1058  )



CEDAR VASE WITH IMAGE OF A DEMON OR GARGOYLE U DESIDE


NATURAL CEDAR VASE KNOTS & GRAIN FORMS IMAGE

Item condition:--
Price:US $1,500,000.00
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MY HUSBAND IS A ARTIST BUT IN THIS CASE NATURE IS THE TRUE ARTIST THIS IS AMAZING TO SEE MY HUSBAND TAUGHT HISSELF HOW TO USE A WOOD LATHE AND HE MAKES HIS OWN TOOLS.  THEY ARE ONE OF A KIND NO ONE PIECE IS THE SAME HE GOES AN FIND OLD DEAD TREES THAT MAY HAVE BEEN DEAD FOR YEARS. THERE IS ONE OF THE OLDEST GRAVE YARD AROUND US IT DATE BACK EVEN BEFORE 1600S THIS GIANT CEDAR TREE HAD BLOWN OVER IN THE GRAVE YARD SO OUT OF RESPECT HE CUT IT UP TO MOVE IT  THE COLOR OF THE HEART WAS SO RICH HE DESIDED TO BRING HOME SOME OF THE PIECES OF THE LOG WHEN HE STARTED TO TURN THIS VASE HE STOPPED BECAUSE THIS IMAGE STOOD OUT AT HIM.  IT IS 100 PERCENT NATURAL THE KNOTS AND GRAIN OF THE CEDAR MADE THIS IMAGE IT IS EVEN RAISED FEELING WHEN YOU TOUCH IT JUST LIKE A DEMON WAS TRAPPED BY THIS CEDAR THE OLD FOLK TAILS SAY THAT INDIANS PLANT CEDARS IN GRAVE YARDS TO CAPTURE THE EVIL SPIRITS THAT IS WHY CEDARS DO NOT DECAY LIKE OTHER TREES BECAUSE THEY CAPTURE EVIL SPIRITS.  THIS IS NOT A HOAX OR IT HAS NOT BE ALTER IN ANY WAY THE ONLY THING MY HUSBAND PUT ON IT LACQUR TO SEAL IT FROM WEATHER IT NOT CARVED OR DRAWN.  THIS IS AMAZING YOU WILL NEVER SEE ANOTHER THAT IS IN FULL DETAIL.  THE WEIRD THING IS THE OTHER PIECES OF LOG HE MADE ITEMS OUT OF HAVE DEMON FACES IN THEM TO BUT NOT THE WHOLE BODY LIKE THIS ONE.THIS IS TRULY NATURES WOUNDER.  YOU WOULD HAVE TO SEE IT IN PERSON TO REALLY EXPERENCE IT THESE PICTURES DOES NOT DO IT JUSTICE.  DEMON, EVIL SPIRT, GARGOYLE, YOU DESIDE BUT IT DEAFLY SOMETHING CAPTURE INSIDE

WORLD'S MOST EXPENSIVE THOUGHT

I guess this guy just sits around and thinks about stuff that people have already thought before. Then expects people to think he's great.... and pay him lots of money for no good reason. 


Okay, so I suppose it's possible that someone somewhere offered him the standard penny for his thoughts, but I bet that person asked for his money back. 




(text below copied from http://cgi.ebay.com/WORLDS-MOST-EXPENSIVE-THOUGHT-/270785797682?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item3f0c175e32#ht_500wt_1075  )


WORLD'S MOST EXPENSIVE THOUGHT

Will do more good than trillions spent by government

Item condition:--
Price:US $21,000,000.00
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eBay bucksYou'll earn $100.00 in eBay Bucks. See conditions
Shipping:FREE Economy Shipping  |  See all details
Delivery:
Estimated between Tue. Aug. 2 and Mon. Aug. 15 help icon for Estimated delivery date - opens a layer
Returns:
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Restoring Earth's Cosmic Significance

Throughout much of history, Earth was considered the center of the universe - the grand stage of the universe in which God was very much involved. Over time, particularly from the 1960's onward, science and those with a vested interest in removing the troublesome constraints of God, successfully recast the earth as a cosmically insignificant speck of dust. The recent reduction of earth's cosmic significance produced an anthem, "Dust In the Wind," and a scientific creed, the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle. College professors endlessly led their classes in discussions of whether a tree falling in a forest made a noise in the absence of a human being. The fact that the laws of science are not suspended in the absence of human observation is very troubling to those who wish to make man the measure of all things.

The earthly chaos caused by the ascendancy of the concept of an unordered and purposeless universe has been disastrous. It is time to restore earth's cosmic significance.

If the earth was the size of the sun, would it gain any more significance? In an infinite universe, all mass is equally finite. No increase in the earth's size can increase its significance. The earth is the size it is by design, magnificent in its ordered complexity, and with abundant evidence of a mindful God to whom we are accountable and responsible. 
 

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Stimson's Parasitic Bloat Worm

I'm not sure if anything like this really exists in nature. I know there are some big worms out there. (A few people I'm acquainted with comes to mind.) But seriously, why???


Stimson's Parasitic Bloat Worm

Stimson's Parasitic Bloat Worm
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Stimson's Parasitic Bloat WormStimson's Parasitic Bloat WormStimson's Parasitic Bloat WormStimson's Parasitic Bloat Worm
You never know what you will bring back from a Venusian Amazon voyage ! 

In this particular case it was a stunning example of Stimson's Parasitic Bloat Worm. This handsome and affectionate specimen was burying it's head between my scapulae and working it's way into my flesh when I discovered it. Charming wot?

Of course I couldn't leave it there. I'd have to alter all of my frock coats to accommodate its rapidly expanding form. So I had it removed and ensconced in Tinplate Eternity Elixir™.

Now this magnificent creature is available to you! Who could resist it! From it's glistening, toxin packed stinger to it's grinning radula, the Stimson's Parasitic Bloat Worm will burrow it's way into your heart.

Jar Dimensions: 

Height: 6.5 in
Width: 4 in
$50.00 USD
Only 1 available

Dwarven Beard - Long Grey Crochet Beard with Braided Moustache

Not sure why we all don't have one of these. I could see this as the next big trend with the kiddies, but why not just buy a mop for $12?




Dwarven Beard - Long Grey Crochet Beard with Braided Moustache

Dwarven Beard - Long Grey Crochet Beard with Braided Moustache
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Dwarven Beard - Long Grey Crochet Beard with Braided MoustacheDwarven Beard - Long Grey Crochet Beard with Braided MoustacheDwarven Beard - Long Grey Crochet Beard with Braided MoustacheDwarven Beard - Long Grey Crochet Beard with Braided MoustacheDwarven Beard - Long Grey Crochet Beard with Braided Moustache
"I have spread my beard under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my beard."
-William Butler Yeats

This listing is for one crochet beard and braided moustache made with soft grey 100% acrylic yarn. These beards fit comfortably on the face and can be easy put on and removed, unlike a real beard, which is permanent. It can warm your face while boosting your confidence at the same time, so don't attend your next board (beard) meeting without it!

Please visit my policies section for more information and FAQs!
http://www.etsy.com/shop/RexJericho/policy


This beard was made in my living room while watching Equilibrium.

$45.00 USD
Only 1 available
RexJericho

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